Why I believe in God

While generally critiqued and frowned upon in pseudo-intellectual circles, if you're not contradicting yourself every so often, you're sitting at a stand-still.

But I digress.

Let's go over the real subject which is none other than:

I've returned to faith. I can proudly state that I'm no longer a hopeful agnostic.

Why so? I did not have a near-death experience. I did not have an intellectual awakening. Au contraire.

1. The basis of my newly-found faith is purely Solipsistic and Egocentric. I was born a Catholic. I am merely fulfilling my own destiny.

2. I realized that my "disregarded" upbringing… protestant mother and quasi-facist Opus Dei father stirred me into directions of nothingness.

   This one is not all too bad as it allowed for individual critical tought and self-analysis, however I'd like to give my descendants a structured life.

   I must admit that if I had less "figuring out" to do by myself, I would have wasted less time.

   Always love your destiny though. AMOR FATI. Do not beat around the bush.

3. More than Catholic per-se, I am a Christian.

   Even during my swings between atheism, agnosticism… I've always been intrigued by the figure of Christ.

   To me, Christ is the embodiment of the a non-conformist.

   So the core of western civilization (the greatest civilization to ever exist) is built on rebellion and individualism.

   While I do respect Shintoism and Buddhism, for their civilizing (albeit subduing) aspects.

   I believe Individualism triumphs. It is the nest of rational thought.

4. But radical individualism does not necessarily bring order. In fact, it is very difficult to control, so the institution has its use. So has a sense of belonging.

5. It's also exhilarating to be a righteous Catholic. One who puts Christ as the central figure of faith, not the institution. We all know the historical Jesus would cleanse the temple today.

A life without God is simply not worth living. It's hopeless. It is dark, it is misguided.

A life without roots is not something I want for my children.

I've lived dark times, and good times. God has always been there for me. I could've been finished by now, and yet I am still here (pre wipe-out readers know).

FYI – This is not going to become a religious blog from now on. But you shall know where I stand.

Curiously I named this blog St. Johnny 15 years ago. It was a tongue-in-cheek contradiction back then. And it is today.

And as always.

Plan relentlessly.

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

Proverbs 3:5–6